Letting go of your children after they have reached adulthood is never easy for a mother.  This stage of your life is often referred to as "empty nest syndrome".

While it may be difficult at first for parents to cope with their children leaving, here are some tips to help make the change a little easier to manage:

• It will take time to come to terms with the fact that your child/children have left the house so it is natural to feel sad when it first happens. One could even say that you may have to go through something of a "mourning period" to deal with the loss, after which you can put the temporary depression behind you and move on.
• Single parents who have spent a lot of time with their children will find the loss all the more difficult. The best way to deal with an empty nest for a single parent is to try to avoid the feeling of loneliness that accompanies your children leaving home.  You can do this by engaging in any of a number of social activities. Volunteer with helping with church/ mosque activities; join a gym or book club or anything else you find enjoyable that puts you in the company of people.  If you miss your nurturing role, volunteer work is the ideal solution, as it not only makes you feel involved in terms of helping others but provides a great deal of support to those who need it.
• It can be quite shocking to discover that you no longer have your care-giving parental role to play. To deal with this, embark on a journey of self-discovery.   Rediscover yourself by taking baths, long walks, sitting on the beach and watching the sunset etc.
• To avoid feelings of guilt for both parents and children, keep in touch through phone calls, sms-ing or emails. Do remember though that your children need to gain a sense of independence and bombarding them with phone calls too often will do more harm than good.  Keep a perspective on these things.

Remember that no matter how old and mature they grow, they are still your children.  Let them grow up and claim their independence.  Be secure in knowing that the bonds you share will last forever, regardless of what stage of life you are experiencing.

Links:

• Women Today
• SurfNetParents
• Helium.com
• Empty Nest Moms

Last Update: 04 May 2011